that's an acceptable place to lick
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
It's rum buckets o'clock
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Randomize
