At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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