So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
it glows. i had to have it.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
