I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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