marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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