There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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