you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
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