Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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