see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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