Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
i think i just lost a toe
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
