I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
