you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
