I love black thongs
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
