Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Randomize
