After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
now i know why i became what i already was.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
