I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
