My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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