Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
