the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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