HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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