So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize