I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
