Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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