While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
