No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
