She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
