She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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