I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize