my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
