I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
