hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
