Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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