i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
