I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
