I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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