D3 body, D1 cock
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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