Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
