this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
