doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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