erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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