If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
