There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
