sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
