A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
