You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
