the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
