I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
