Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
