Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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