Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
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